(Now playing: Love on the brain - Rihanna)
Happy New Year to everyone. 2016 has been a tough year, for me at least. A week of the new year have passed and 90% of people I've interacted said that 2016 was a rollercoaster, emotional, etc. Well, that's for me as well.
2016 was emotionally tiring for me and it was about trying new things too. Changing cell groups, being a clan head for church camp, stepping out of my comfort zone, had an awesome and stressful internship with Corporate-I, camped in and out of CLB with fiona (we spent approximately more than 100 hours there in 2016 alone), endless projects, worked on a tender with my parents for the first time and so many more experiences. All these moulded me into who I am today, though.
There are still many questions left unanswered in my head. Questions that only God can answer and no one else can. But all that remains in 2016 and I've made a conscious decision to move on from those uncertainty.
This question has been lingering in my head since 2017 started. Do I know who am I? Have I found myself?
Yes, no, I don't know, but its probably a yes. I would say that the issues and circumstances that happened in 2016 moulded and defined who I was. It was in 2016 that I took a step of faith to believe in my parents vision to introduce the value of play into society. 2016 was also the year I decided to plunge into the unknown waters of a completely new cell group. Perhaps taking over my parents' company and becoming a cell group leader seems to be the path set out for me. But is it really want I want? Or rather, what God wants?
But who exactly is Sarah Lee here? I guess I'll never ever find out this answer because relationships are always changing, my circumstances change, views change, my character, my personality gets modified a certain way. 'I'm going to travel to the US to find myself' or, 'I'm going to travel to find myself', are those things the internet says or some self-help books say. Yea right, that bullshit ain't gonna happen. I think travelling gives people new perspectives but it doesn't allow you to find your life purpose.
How am I going to attempt to find myself?
2017 is going to be about finding out more about myself and finding out more perspectives about life. 2017 is not going to be about finding love because I've realized that God is love, family is love and friends are love.
My driving license is on its way and my Seattle dream is finally coming true. 2017 is going to be about saying more nos than yeses. 2017 is going to be about loving myself, my family and best friends.
No one is going to dictate what I do, my choices, who I want to hang out with, how I want to spend my time, who I spend my time with. Life is unpredictable and I am unpredictable. haha.
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