another in the fire

And I can see the light in the darkness
As the darkness bows to Him
I can hear the roar in the heavens
As the space between wears thin
I can feel the ground shake beneath us
As the prison walls cave in
Nothing stands between us
Nothing stands between us

Another in the fire 

i finally understood the value of Jesus Christ dying on the cross for me and with this, 

i am fully convinced that the holy spirit is real. he is my helper. my best friend who comforts me, not when no one is there, but when i feel like nothing on this earth can ever fill this void inside. 

i am fully convinced that the same holy spirit that raised Jesus from the dead is in me. and i dont say this because i want to feel strong or have something to hold on to. but it is a declaration of my faith in the Lord Jesus Christ.

i am fully convinced that i am wholly, exclusively owned by God. my life here on this earth is meant for Him and only Him alone. and He deserves the freedom to take away and put things into my life. and with this in mind, i find freedom in this. 

i am fully convinced that i am not of my own. instead, i am a child, fathered by His majesty. that He sent His son, to be fully human, to die on the cross for me. 

- 

temporary things and the only permanent thing

dissertation has ended. its been 1..2..3..4 days in to bible school. perhaps one thing i've learnt thus far is that nothing on this earth is permanent, except God. 

Nothing is permanent. forgive me, for such cynicism, or perhaps for throwing such a reality. insta stories are temporary, the moment is temporary, sometimes it feels as if its just the wind that breezes by. no matter how much you catch it, you cannot. it just passes you by. 

some friendships come and go. they are seasonal, just for the moment, just like a wind that breezes through your hair. i come to realise that friends really come and go. really. 

the holy spirit reminded me, that me offering my friendship to someone is like me presenting a gift to someone. here's the catch: the person has the freedom to accept or reject this 'gift'. and i've come to realise that not everyone would accept this gift. even if the person may have accepted the 'gift', the receiver still has every right to make use of this 'gift'. he could just put it at home and leave it dormant. 

and ive come to a place where it is okay, if you've left this gift somewhere, chucked in a corner collecting dust. this is not from a place of self pity, that people don't care about what i offer or how I am not appreciated. i'll still do my best to love in my capacity but i've come to terms of holding it loosely. 

but i've come to realise that the only permanent thing throughout my life is God. the holy spirit. the same holy spirit has been with me since i said my first prayer when i was 11. and the same holy spirit is still with me as i sing 'come holy spirit' during bible school. he's not just a passing wind that brushes and tickles my face, but he lingers for a little while more, gently, like a gentleman. 

nothing is permanent. only God, his promises, the cross, and the holy spirit is. 

well, and thank you, to those who stayed, you know who you are.